﻿Slim Reveals Origin of Quip About Women 
By T-BONE SLIM 
 
Water is getting so scarce in New York City that some of the boys are drinking whiskey without chasers. 

Those new Swedish guns can kill a guy 60 times a minute. In an hour a guy can die almost a half-thousand deaths. 

No choice for Movie Queen this year. So. Bette Davis, guess you’ll have to take it. Luckily they shoved Lionel Barrymore in the line-up or we’d be without a king too. What is the reason W. C. Fields was left out in the cold? Looks like sabotage. 

Generally, when a Russian commander is transferred we do not hear of his great deeds of 
heroism thereafter . . . 
What’s the matter? Have they no good liars over there? 
Japanese Nobuyuki Abe resigned and is breathing just as sweetly as he ever did. 
L. Hore-Belisha fell overboard and lives. 
A few remarks Charley Lindbergh had to make upon the relative merits of armed forces in Europe seem eo ‘stick like dung to a blanket.” 
Swede to the Rescue 
No, it wasn’t the fire department, it wasn’t the police—they all came too late. 
It was a Swede! 
A woman had fallen overboard and a man after her— both age 60. No romance was there! No sunbaked debutante beckoned the hero! The weather was cold. Ice cakes floated abaft Brooklyn. He went overboard, age 30 to 35, and he brought them both ashore—unconscious. 
The Swedish ship at anchor lay, moored to the docks at Brooklyn. 

The Bronx: Sandscow improperly loaded—without sufficient rake to stern, i. e., even keel) overturned. Three drowned. 
“Wind, Water and Tide,” is press story. 
Better a Lions’ Den 
Earl Browder would rather be elected to congress in New York’s 14th than go to jail. We all have our likes and dislikes. 
I’d rather step into a lions’ cage than go to congress. And I wouldn’t be torn up less. One who thinks he can reform congress better try the lions. (Not Lion of Idaho.) 
Borah’s chief claim to fame was the coming-out party—second best to Clarence Darrow. They say “Borah could have been elected President did he live in a more populated state.” 
Hm. Clarence Darrow lived in the middle of the Inland Empire and I do not remember him being President—lots of people all around him. 
Be it said: Clarence died waiting—so did Borah and so will I. Give the freaks first chance. 
 
Dewey blasts the New Deal for keeping nine million unemployed from the point of production. He wants private enterprise freed to take up the slack. Hm. Private enterprise gave us 16 million unemployed, and Prof. Dewey no doubt thinks P. E. (private enterprise), if it can make ‘em, can also break ‘em. 
Nothing stands in the way of private enterprise today and they are raking in the shekels by the barrelfullt ----even whacking up with the glammor girls and Mr. Roosevelt’s government. But it’s not a conspiracy; it’s just one of those things that happen. 
In the meantime us poor, unorganized workers ain’t eating or drinking and wassil is at a very low ebb indeed. 

Armies are ruling several nations. Don’t point—you might bend the finger. 

Two dollars eighty-five lunch in Berlin —soup, bread and butter. Seems unreasonable at first blush, but when we consider the Germans are among the world’s best souper-uppers, we must concede the lunch a favorable light alongside the famous Jackson Day $100 plates. 
Why, the soup alone may have had in it half of a Polish horse, and you can’t buy pacers for $5.70 in wartime. 
The price we have to pay! is the great cry. The change we have to take! is never heard. 
The most beautiful term in the English language: “Keep the change.” 
I once used that term thinking “the change from a dollar bill is a nice tip.” It was later (too late) I discovered I had handed the waiter a ten spot. 
I couldn’t sleep for a week. Lost flesh —what with the landlady pounding at the door. 

It was a woman (trying to escape from a wheelbarrow) that invented the saying: “Woman’s place is in the home.” 
Some men fell for it like a ton of bricks and the echo goes ringing down the ages of history. It worked! 

Sayeth Sally Rand: “It’s no disgrace to be broke; it’s only a disgrace to stay broke.” 
Up go the wages! 
It’s no disgrace to get licked; it’s only a disgrace to stay licked. 
Join the Wobblies. 
We’ll be broke so long as we entertain slave drivers and dish unto them $1,000 a day spending money. 
A nation that countenances slave driving is not democratic in any essential.