﻿Hitler Does “A Greeley” A La Corrigan 
By T-BONE SLIM 
 
I see where Hitler took on 2,400,000 new customers for German goods in Slovakia—mebbe that’s what the shouting’s all about? 
Trade agreement with Czechoslovakia goes up Salt Creek and Hull’s face red? 
The Slovak shoes nearly Put Endicott Johnson on the bum. 
Oh ho! So we’ve been lending Czechoslovakia money, $165,620,270—a mere bagatelle. Kiss the bucks goodbye; they’re in the Reich now. 
WPA is asking for $150,000,000, but, as everyone knows, WPA hasn’t a handlebar moustache. 
Can’t pull a monocle against and economic condition. (Praha and Bratislava please copy). Nations stand a better show standing “too but” than “too small.” The bigger the nation the better it can withstand spotted over-expansion: by taxing whole for the boners (grandeur) of the few. “Drang Nach Osten,” reminds me: “Go West, Young Man, and Grow Up With the Country” 

A tight spot: 
To allow the people referendum is to deny representative government. 
To deny referendum is to deny the people a vote. 
Democracy without a vote is a queer bird. 

Latest food script plan is a bit labored but it has all the elements of American “grandstand” (indirection) —if nothing comes of it, at least the god-fearing grocers won’t have to cut from their own shelves. 
Streaks of compulsion and prohibition appear in the program. 
I cannot believe that it is the worthy object of a great government to place our destinies in the hands of a half-starved grocer in a laudable effort to defang the paradox that compels millions to go hungry while huge agricultural stores go to waste. 
There is not surplus except hunger and want. 
Problems, Problems. Problems. 
Einstein finds key to riddle “the bigger they come the harder they fall.” He calls it gravity. By the same token “clam chowder” is Wednesday’s gravy, Thursday’s soup and Friday’s clam, and an investigation is in order—a mystery resides here. 

Jitters: (March 13) “New York’s Legislature, which two years ago acted to make marriage more difficult, tonight agreed to make it easier.”—Daily News. 
Legallights in Albany probably figured loving couples haven’t the money to go elsewhere and get hitched? How little we understand finance and “Love finds a way!” 
Marrying parsons threatened to go on relief and $47,000 worth of wedding cakes went sour so the lawgivers cut off two days from the six day speed limit of eternal bliss. 
That’s what the lawgivers are working at in Albany with a budget “greatest in history of good ol’ Empire State.” 

Some people have decided to get their reward in heaven. I honor them for the consciousness of having something coming. 
Others take their reward here and now without waiting for the crack of doom. They are our employers. We do not give it to them, they take it from our pay envelope before we get a crack at it. We get the balance. And, I suppose, they’ll collect second time “up in heaven.” 

Patriots of New York city are taking the uniform from the backs of the German Bund; incidentally laying their ropes to dress America’s youth into uniforms. It all adds up two and two—the warmakers. 
The scheme is: Keep Fritz Kuhn running from court to court; confiscate his time. 
“How many swastikas did you sell, Fritz?” 
“How many newspapers?” 
All material, 2 by 4 trivia—ye gods, won’t U. S. ever grow up. 
Seems to me the conspirators (patriots all— not necessarily USA patriots) have been rushing across the pond in a steady stream the past two years, risking their precious necks to the wiles of the Atlantic. 
I’ll tell you, boys and girls, cut out the conniving and let someon that “knows how” organize system for you.