﻿IN WHERE I’M A LIAR 
 
I believe I have somewhere said that the capitalist system always has been bad. And it may be that I have left that impression in the minds of my defenceless readers. Now if I have so done 1 wish to retract such statement, and efface such impression, on the grounds that all mortals are prone to err— and, on the grounds, that I am as mortal as anybody — mebbe more mortal than some. And furthermore, I waint it retracted because it isn’t true; and, (if I said so) I’m a liar. . . . 
The capitalists system was not always bad ; even as my rheumatism didn’t always have the pep it now has; even as my hump at one time was modest to the point of absenteeism. 
These things, capitalism, rheumatism end alcoholism, etc., have small beginnings, (and terrible endings). ‘That leads us to believe that a small hump is a good hump; that a little rheumatism is fine far the legs and that a little capitalism is not bad at all— otherwise, I don t see how we can retract the statement that capitalism wus always bad. 
It seems we have a hair to split—and no wedges to do it with. 
Some people [uncelar]en capitalism to a boil ana put forth pretentious argument to prove that a boil purities the blood. Well then, our blood must be getting pretty pure by now, for the boil sure is a whopper — (I didn’t know we had so much bad blood) — l wonder if lancing would do any good? 
So capitalism is a boil, is it, and purifies the blood, If so, then, the bigger it is the most impurities it must throw off. From this it can be seen that’ the size of the boil is determined by the amount of impurities in the blood. But it would seem to me that it isn’t boils that we need, but Cascarets, or something like that, that “work while you sleep.” Yes, the sleep you are undergoing should not be disturbed. Now isn’t it possible that capitalism (like boils) feeds on the impurities in the social system and that, like boils, capitalism is but evidence that the impurities are there? And, that impurities (parasites) should be gotten rid of before they break out in capitalism’s (boils) big, small or medium. I’m inclined to that viewpoint, in fact, I’m heartily in favor of ridding ourselves of ail parasites, low, medium or great; boils, the same; capitalism, ditto; all three, pronto— the prontoer the better. 
Now in conclusion we will bring our wedges and split the hair so that each and all may view the operation I will raise the “hair” again. Here she is: “The capitalist system was not always bad”? 
Now to split it we will put our wedge on the word “always” and we will then merely assert, that, since capitalism did not always exist, it could not have always been bad. It has been bad only the short period of its eistence, (up to date) which falls short of always by 33,000,000,000 years and seven months. 
Capitalism was not always bad nor will it always BE bad. It was good before it came and will again be good after it is gone. 
“Speed the day,” as George would say. But, I’ll concede, it has been less bad the farther baik we look and has been steadily growing worse; and will grow much worse with increasing steadiness until it goes down in a blaze of its own iniquity. Do not, oh do not, delude yourself that it is capable of getting better. 
Periodically, if would appear the system “soaks” us less violently but what does it mean? It simply means that the last BOIL was in an awkward place. (Like a boil on your best girl’s nose) I say “best girl” advisedly, most of ‘em’s best, and the rest are better—yesterday, today and forever, plus. 
I know not whether jails be right 
Or whether jails be wrong 
But this I know —that pay is small 
And hours —hellish long.